Tuesday, April 29, 2025

deemed smoke

I am a smoke screen 
Looking at me
You see the illusion
That's deemed for me
Upon a time to tell
I am powerful
I am strong 
Needing to be free if insanity 
I am a beautiful disaster 
Wanting something more
Something that life needs
Smile here
Nervous to be fully self
I am free
But smoke screen 
Fully dreaming
Illusion deemed 
Break free
Of the solitude 
What am I?
Naming what needs
To be me
Fully defeated 
Victor of the night
Breathing easy
Finally free
Just to be me
Smoke free
Destination deemed 
Finally here there everywhere
I am me

Thursday, April 17, 2025

Steadfast

Allah you are my light
Without you I'm truly lost
Guide me through the darkness 
Hold my soul tight 
You are my Noor
Bring me hope for tomorrow
For you are the greatest
Oh Allah, I love you
The almighty 
Allah
I fall to my knees and beg you to save me
From the traps, of this world
Bringing peace to my heart
Guide my soul
I shall not break


My Eman is here
Steadfast 
Strong willed 
I'm lost without you
Allah give me shifa
Guide me through the Dunya 
Hold my heart tight 
Embrace my solitude 
I love you Allah 
Allahu Akbar
Help me conquer my nafs
I stand tall
Not breaking
Make me steadfast 
With my will 
Oh Allah Almighty
Bring me peace of mind
Allah the most beloved 
You are the best of the best
Guiding me so
That is peace
Islam is best for me



Monday, April 7, 2025

breaking sight

Twinkle twinkle on the time
Flicker here flicker there 
Every reflection 
Every time they come
Breaking my mind
My sanity fades 
Will this be the time
A rip my eyes out
Time fades 
Patterns here
Banging on my heart 
I begin to fade 
My heart thumps
Every so fast 
Will I just fade into the wall
Drifting every direction
Breaking my sanity
Shall I end this way 
Patterns coming 
Breaking my heart
Pleaing with my Lord
To save me from myself
Why oh why shall this be
Reaping the deadly deeds
Twinkle comes
Patterns here
What will be will be
Insanity at the brim
Self fades into stone
Falling from grace
What will be will be 
Insanity destined
Heavenly saved for another time

Wednesday, March 12, 2025

holding on to being

Waking up, holding tight the air from within
Breaking my hand 
It sure is a demand 
Upon faith to start
Oh Allah Grant me serenity
Holds me tight 
Bring me hope 
Away from the darkness 
Holding air tight 
Suffocating to the max 
Unable to cope 
Hoping for something more 
Upon a time to tell 
Destined to be 
Let me plea with my Lord indeed 
I fall to my knees and plea and plea 
To conquer the darkness 
To allow hope to consume 
To bring happiness 
That is what is sought 
A smile here. A smile there. A smile everywhere 
Where to go from here? 
Wanting something more 
Follow the light into the hole 
Where the rabbit follows you so 
Or are you following the rabbit instead? 
Crazy Beyond sanity 
Darkness here and light over there 
Where to go from here? 
On and on again 
Will that depend? 
Have some hope 
Gather the strength 
Bring the peace 
Oh Allah 
Where to go from here? 
Where to want to be? 
Allah said be be 
So here I am full of insanity 
Running on the treadmill to Hope 
Holding on to something 
To the light that resides in my heart 
To conquer the darkness 
To conquer something more 
Where to go from here?
Let it be let it be fully full of insanity 
I guess that is me 
Destined to be

Thursday, January 23, 2025

Walking into the Abyss

Walking on sunshine 
Open your eyes
The patterns appear 
Causes nothing but anxiety 
One have another gave more
They stare so insanely 
Will this nightmare end
Happening from nothingness 
Pattern here 
The illusion of the delusion 
Wanting peace near 
Finding nothing but darkness 
Wanting nothing but hope 
Illusions why are they here? 
Will the cure come with hope? 
To plead with the Lord Allah 
Wanting nothing but it to end 
Up down all around 
Nothing but the delusion of the illusion 
Hoping for something more 
Reaping with the soul desires 
Nothing but an end 
To the insanity that bends 
The mind that sees 
Nothing but the illusion that he's
Jump! Hooray! Yippee! 
Lost within the insanity 
Is this truly what Allah wants me to be? 
Up down all around 
Pitter pattern. Let's get at it
Glimmering hope 
Carnage on it's way
Hoping for an ending
Let it be let it be
Even within this insanity 
Will I be free? 
Ever here ever more

Saturday, January 11, 2025

Pleading with fate

Lightly here
Ponder until the chaos breaks
That cool and calm
Serenity gone
Nothing but disaster ahead
Falling to knees
Pleading for insanity to start at Bay
Lord oh help me
Conquer the illusion 
Please
I know I am not right
And fall for the najs
Tears reap my soul
As the patterns 
Are breaking my heart
Here to stay 
Will this end soon
I plead with you Lord 
Allah the only one for me
I plead
Insanity breaks me
What to do from here? 
Tears well up
Patterns stricken the sight
Unable to cope
Wanting the flame
The blade
Is this fate?
So here I am being
For Allah says be
Even within the illusions
That be
Serenity give me the strength
To conquer the nags
Patterns go from me
Let me be free
Please oh Lord Allah
Save me from myself
Me my oh my
What to do
But plea 
To conquer the najs
Will it free me
Let it be
Full of insanity 
Just be

Saturday, November 9, 2024

Just Stay

Starting again 
Ready Set go go 
Bending to the desire
No more shall I feed the insanity 
The monster is waiting
For me to fall
I hear it roar
It wants more carnage 
Am I ready to be? 
Clean and sober
Facing my emotions
To not suffocate on the smoke
To put away the blades
For the flame calls me
To break my will 
I am strong
Not broken
But rebuilding 
What to do? 
But steps
They are the medicine of the heart 
To make me great again
To free me from the najs 
Help self without smoke
For the insanity is at the brim
Bubbling over, wanting carnage 
I will not Bend
Nor break
For I'm on the mend
So grant me sobriety 
Oh Lord of eternal wisdom 
God save me
Before I reap the deeds of the devil
Only you can save me
Oh Allah Almighty 
Help me stay
Just stay