pleading

Please Lord save me from the despair

Save me me from my life

Lost with the abyss bubbling at the brim

Broken bent tarnished so many words

What hurts the most, is the uncertainty 

I plea with Allah to save me from myself

To take me to serenity 

I surrender to him

Alone 

La illal ill Allah 

There is so God but Allah 

Guide my heart from the najs of the Dunya 

Bring me closer to the Deen 

Losing control 

Save my life oh Lord

I love you

With more heart for you than myself

Broken beyond mend 

Never lose hope

Never fall to the whispers

The voices scream in my heart

To make me bleed

This is insanity 

Is it meant for me? 

So plea

Surrender yourself

To save yourself

Only with Allah 

definitely distorted

Twitchy switch

With the wrists 

Do I understand

What will come if this

The disaster of the Dunya

Unable to control 

Twitching to a switch 

Pitter pattern 

Let's get at them

What are they? 

As I stare so plainly 

So blankly 

But my vision so distorted 

Twitching to the beat

Ticking and rocking

At the end

Break my will 

Will this be the end? 

Hoping for sanity 

To break free from distortion of mind 

To have freedom

Trying to hope

Inshallah

Always

Stellar

Stellar lights around 

A firework going off in your mind 

Bringing in peace, only to find the mad hatter

Unable to cope, to reason, to ask for help

How can one? 

Confusion, distorted mind

Born to been insane

Serenity lost, the Noor flickers

Depression near and dear

Comes for all

Schizophrenic maniac 

At the bend, screaming for this life to end

Stellar visions ahead

Sparkling shapes, ever so slightly 

Not here, hope for the end

Losing hope at the time

For a lost individuals

Blueprints for the mind

So scramble disaster 

Ready for this after 

To seek a 

To bring in disaster 

Having something other than insanity 

What is needed? 

What is wanted? 

Wanting something not getting 

Trying so hard too to be 

Losing self

Sanity off on the bend 

Insanity in the rift 

Disaster, hope, hopelessness, Faith 

Bringing in faith to this unsorted events

Eman in the heart, fighting the carnage 

Thinking wondering wanting needing not succeeding 

Trying so hard to understand 

Confusion distorted thinking 

Stinking the mind 

Causing doubt within 

Doubt in self

Shall they seek the light? 

Even within the Noor 

Carnage will never end 

Insanity will never be at the brim 

But forever reminding you 

That you are not there 

Am I here? 

Do I belong? 

What will come? 

So many questions barely any answers 

So logical. It's illogical 

Irrational being 

Rational human 

Hoping for something 

Not knowing what that is 

Losing self within the carnage 

Stellar sparkles of pitter pattern 

To seek Hope so you don't lose to the disaster 

Recovery is possible 

What a lie, does this define what is insane 

Surely not sanity 

No longer self either 

Someone else a stranger 

Save me from myself or the stranger that is

I call to Allah to save me

Even though I am disaster 

Deserving Mercy 

Is this a test? 

Am I failing this test? 

What will come? 

So many questions 

Not many answers 

Barely any sanity here 

Gripping on to Noor

Forever more

spectacle show

Havoc arises, boiling point bursts

To extend the emotions

As they turn and rotate a spectacle display 

Ridge Sharp emotions 

Moving through me

Unable to cope

What is reality?

Why this confused state? 

Here I am

Seeking refuge in Allah from accursed Satan

An attack, wounds all over

I shall conquer my emotions 

For Allah is by my side

Allahu Akbar 

Able to slumber, only to ride

Not well rested

The aftermath 

Is here 

Alhamdulillah  

To learn, not letting the burst to explode 

Ridges blades hit

Cris Cross my heart

To seek refuge to Allah

That is the key

To panic climaxes 

Love Allah, love self, love others

There will be peace of mind 

Inshallah

Destiny's sanity

Fading into the wall 

Falling for fate, for destiny in concerned 

Breaking the host

Who is the most sane?

I'm this solitude of the mind

Shot to the abyss

Will I dismiss?

Instead I wallow

Wow is me 

Let me breathe

Have some freedom from the najs

Seeking solitude with thy Lord

Have faith always, do not break

Be on the mend

Striving here and there

Hope for something, missing it

What is it? 

Allahu allim 

Only time will tell

One two three

Start again, holding to sanity

Losing my grip 

Insanely here, stuck to wallow

I swallow whole with a voice of the mind and emotion 

Shifting mixing ripping blades of emotional vibes

Not even my own

But affected such

Sadness 

Despair 

Those monster's calls for me 

Snickers 

Calls some more

I have Eman, I shall not break

Not Bend, but stay steadfast in the Deen

I may be alone with the Snickers of them 

I call to thee

Allah I love you

Save me from the Snickers 

From the despair 

Bring the Noor in with every breath

Break not, for Allah guides me

Bring hope, saving grace

Let me be free

Yet stuck in insanity 

Still human, just not free

Let me be

Allah save me always

glorious heaven

Upon the light 

The world came to be 

Stunning perfection 

The year starts on 

Spring has come 

Snow is gone 

Melting disaster 

Weather warming 

Seeds are sowed 

To the soil, of the Earth 

Soon comes the showers 

To bring life 

To give us a gift 

As the water tapers off 

Here comes the flowers 

That bring us greenery

To feed the Earth 

Glorious is this world

Alhamduillah 

Fruits of bliss 

Greens for the heart

To grow big and strong 

The creatures that be

For humanity needs

Care for our world

We only have one in the dunya 

Summer breezes 

Flowers of the season 

Creatures frolic within the Meadows 

Dancing to serenity 

That the lord gave 

For perfect perfection at last 

Wonderful nights to cure the heat 

Glorious sunsets to the peak 

Time gets going 

Autumn is near and dear

Red and gold sways within the wind 

Gently comes down 

Giving thanks 

To Allah 

For this Grace of the world 

Soon comes 

Winter is here 

Blanket of whiteness snowfall Bliss 

Spectacle creations of perfection 

Individual snow flake 

Brr for the cold 

Hibernation for the creature 

Under the snow there is life 

Waiting for the spring to come 

Start again 

Upon this time 

Spring has sprung once again 

To start again 

Perfection

Life

5

Start this time 

Time again

Through the pain 

And regret

There was once happiness

Smiling with true glee

Having my true love near me 

Wandering though the thick mist

To dismiss, with the qadar

7

World ends, darkness is the mend 

Love lost, to never return

Till dusk comes now

Upon this time to tell

Sadness trust

Trusting with certainty 

Depression starts 

Lost with the darkness 

8

Hold the clippers tight 

Grasp the metal of the blade

Crimson hope

10

One of the grand has gone

What's left of the heart that beats

Falls far into the abyss

I shall not dismiss 

Lost in worthlessness 

16

Made it this far

Astonished to the max 

Thinking destined for failure 

But striving on 

Not letting the big one take you down 

Letting The whispers stay behind 

20

Made it finally, to the top

Many laughed, holding their judgment above their heads 

Proud with this forgotten glee

Accomplished so much yet. So little 

Lost within abyss 

Finding hope 

Beyond the delusions 

Seeking for truth 

23

Through thought and meditation 

Through Carnage and hope 

Through darkness to light 

To find something so pure 

Found me Allah Almighty 

Set me Free 

To fight the darkness 

And leave it at the bay 

To allow noor 

Flicker within the darkness 

Something starts once again

Finding purpose 

That is Hope 

Having worth, to not break

26

Pitter pattern. Let's get at em

The monsters come 

Vision corrupted 

Hope is lost 

There is no cure 

What to do 

Look for Hope 

Losing faith 

Covering the truth 

Haunting emotions 

Whispers come 

Nothing mends

Darkness consumes 

Mania comes 

Insanity starts 

Crimson hope 

31

Barely sane

I find my Lord 

Again once again 

To have some hope 

That a cure may be found 

For God promised 

Allah does not corrupt 

But soothe the unworthy 

The fools within the world 

To open your heart 

Find Faith again 

To lose once more 

To find again 

To practice hope 

To fight the darkness 

To conquer the light 

My journey begins once again 

Within the dunya

34

Last visit for a while 

Those walls that stare

With boredom comes confusion 

For the first day comes 

When sanity is here 

Insane in the membrane 

The units are gone 

Never again 

I can conquer all 

With Allah Almighty 

He beats the darkness 

And brings the Noor 

38 

Made a mistake 

Half the deen 

Comes to an end 

Start another and be on the mend 

To open up fully 

To stop the blade, for the crimson calls me 

Up down all around 

But with eman 

Truly is not lost 

For Islam is the best medicine for the heart 

Finding hope for the future 

Hoping more for worthlessness to leave 

Having hope and not be hopeless. That is the task 

The task at hand