Tuesday, October 20, 2015

Good Grief

oh thy Lord help me over come my sorrowful mind
those who have passed on into inner and enternal peace
are greeted by the fallen of those memories that serve brightness
may the Lord guide the fallen as he is the shepard to his flock
dont go astray young lamb
or the wolf will get you
and suck you from your flesh he will
for the wolf is but another sheep
for the sheep is this lost flock are cannibalistic
worry not seek help from your Lord
He knows your pain, he can ease it
Help you grieve
even though you where but i child when you lost one
1 2 3 4 5 6
the numbers keep going up
and not enough sorrow to go around
within my mind i trapped in the maze of sorrow
will i let them all go
only to lose my good memories of them
Im already lost the memory of their sweet voices
just a distant thought far away bounceing on a cloud in the white puffy sky
So young lamb, will seek refuge in thy Lord.
during this dire times its best reflect perhaps you will save a soul or two
dont hold your breath or might end up choking for the next one
Young lamb be strong for this grieve you are feeling is natural and will pass
For you have faith
Your fathers father was faithful and reflectful and knowledgeable
Remember you are not alone during this time
So seek thy lord
whenever you are in need
for his Love is everlasting

Saturday, October 10, 2015

Free to be ME



I cant believe it
Sometimes it doesnt matter
but to me it matters
I cant believe he isnt real
All that pain dedicated to him
only to find that memory is but not of reality
maybe tget are right im crazy
maybe their wrong and im right
or could be in the wrong
im not perfect i have my flaws
but fuck we is no one these days
I scream i feel as though im not being heard
Wimper here and there everywhere it seens
I brood they say so what i dont really care
It hurt me doesnt anyone understand
I want her to mean it when she says sorry
does she even know who i am
seems they make there judgement because they know
Fuck you 
you know nothing in what i feel eachday what i am ynless you have felt the emptiness
the angony
the taking of inoccence  again
Fuck you 
oh your offended what you said to me hurt me
and you ya you agree
she is right
I do bad
Im trying to better myself
you dont know what going on up stairs so shut up
what hurts the most is the feelings of rapid emotions
unaable to express only through words
this my testimony
Borderline Personality disorder
live or die
its part of me but it doesnt define me 
im not perfect no one is
but im far from selfish far from toxic
what hurts the most is you agreed anyone who agrees with that isnt a friend of mine because it sounds like you hate my being
why not focus on the good
the kindness
the charity the good deeds the smiles 
thats who i love to be
so sorry if the bitch came out it happens sometimes this me and accept it if you cant then good bye
so long
no one needs that toxic friend
If you feel ever so much even if you love me
dont give me
imma keep fighting but sometimes your wrong doesnt mean im right we both can be
or all three
anyways thats enough
live on free
to be me