striving to live

Striving to Live.

Live...

I want to

but at this point

my lifesource is at a strain

it pours out out of me

each tear repsents an emotion

a memory

soon forgotten by the flood of unsettled emotions

each tear drips down my cheeks

unable to resurface from this reality

I take with my hand a sharp

sliceing out the life source

uncontrolled i am

i suffer from my worst enemy that be myself

the disorder

its rules me

better not tell myself that owns me rights now

it does

for I let my desires take control of me

and with that one two three four five maybe it stopps there

numbers numbers run inside my head

quotes from sisters all around the world echo within my heart

why did God damn me so

questions arise As i ride in the ambulence to the hostipal

hoping i would aquire help there

what a fool was I

I can only help my self is allow my self to heal

healing takes time

But with the steps

1 2 3 here i come soon to come

nothing will stop me not even my desires

hopefully not even my slip ups will not be the end of me

why oh why

seven bowties in the arm

they mend me as i speak

out they go as time flows

seven more days out they go

Light wraap around me

Live for today so we dont fade away

we help eachother

please help me conquer myself my desires to harm myself

why oh why

knock knock devil at the door knock knock

will i answer it

catch my breath

Angel awaits for at the cliff to catch me before i slip

Sisters oh sisters

thank you for being there

dare to inspire

hope before my sanity is lost with hopelessness