Half past four

It hurts me hard
In the endless night
Another night with insomnia
Tick tock tick tock
I last in bed with my eyes shut
Hoping my slumber captures my mind
Unfortunately
Darkness is here
Once I wake
The insanity arises
On the railroad to the end
Cut
Burn
Save me from the emotions
They are rapid
Unable to comprehend the self hate
I lay still
Waiting for my angels to save me
They never come
I'm left with internal Carnage
Tick tock tick is half past 4 am
My thoughts are rapid
I cannot stop this hate
Anger is my heart
And a new hurt comes
Punching
Bash
Shake
Break
Why must it be this way
I write and write
To fight the fight
I'm broken tonight
Must be
To be insane
They say reach out
I still feel like the burden
Perhaps
My feelings are what I truly am
Unable to cope
It's nearly 5 am
What will happen to me
In this chaos
Small whisps
Come to my heart
Are they part of me?
Will they conquer me?
Flick that Bic
The pain
Brings me back to reality
Unfortunately I'm left with destruction of the pillars
That save me
What the hell
Reach out
Breath deep
Suffocate
As you swallow the light
To break the night
It's nearly sunrise
Right
Until next time
Break the darkness
The emptiness
The chaos
I'm free to be me
Even within my insane membrane