Guide us

Let me hear
What is meant for you and I
It's meant for all creation
Sweet Al Quran
Bless me
Bring serenity near to my flesh and soul
My heart is emotionally drained
But the voices of those who believe are deemed to see
What do the blind finally see beyond the deeds
Is this what's meant to be
Emotionally deemed for me
Allahu Allahu Allahu
Are you here?
Do you hear my dua?
I scream within the mind to see beyond the false reality
Aoothu billaah mina shayton ajeem
I'm ready to fight
For you
For I am free to believe
It's destined for me
Shall this mean
That happiness is attainable
Within the serenity of the word
For the word leads me
Deemed right to bask in the light
Allahu guide those deemed to struggle
Our jihad
Some are simple others are hard
Try not to be bitter
Bitterness leads to doubts
And within this you will hear his whispers
We know who you are
Authoo billaah mina shayton ajeem
I am free to choose
Ashdo aana la illaah ilaallaah wa ashdo  ana Muhammadan rusaallah
And let us scream deemed for you and I
I'm a Muslim
I suffer but life is but a test
Aspire to care for self so you can desire the Deen
That's right
I'm here
Free once again
Allahu Allahu Allahu
Guide me

This will be Now

I stand falling to my knees
I as I prostrate to thee
Allah almighty
I must confess to you with my heart
this pain
this monster than lies deep within me
Is here with me even within the sanity that is with you
Something familiar arises in thy soul
dare i say who
He conquers me so
I seek refuge in you oh Allah
because remember dua is the best

He still lingers
Of my mind
unable to cope
So dare i say
I'm free to be me within this insanity

he snickers and suggests and demands
tears run rapid down my cheers my eyes water
no time for tears
I'm ashamed
I'm not worth it
I'm tarnished
beyond repair

Why even bother saving me

I confess though in my heart and soul
that your the only God for me
not him
not his suggestions are unjust
unlike you oh Allah
you are loving
Merciful
Forgiving
Just
Without you the world truly would be lost

I feel lost within emotions
my heart says Islam is the way but i still doubt self
how can one love self 100%
not attainable for me
not yet
never

Oh Allah
Save me from my self
purify my heart
bring the Rage to Bliss
unable to conquer the darkness
left to fight tis battle on wards
its truly my jihad my struggle the insanity
i don't think anything else but you will help
Even now I don't want to be
even in this sanity I drift
and doubt
so remember you always in dkhr
you are the only one worthy of worship
One God One Love One Life

I seek refuge in Allah From the accursed Satan
Ashadu la illah allah ashadu muhammedan rusuallah
Allahu akbar
With you
I Cannot this alone
so in remembrance to you only I will try and try again
and return to you always...

Time will tell

Millions of emotions run through me
Like the current of life source
I ran so far
For so long
Only to find you again
I could only deny for so long
Before I confessed
To you alone
Then to another
Soon time will tell
If I bask in everlasting Noor
Aquire I'll
Apply it
To mold the outcome
To positively potential
To please you Allah
Nothing else matters