Upon this day

There is but hustle and oh so bustle

To prepare for what is deemed right in this day

To be

To smile

A kindness one two three four, how many more?

Does it matter what is reality beyond the illusion

Shall I reside what is light?

Perhaps this is right, but back to the endless day

With smiles and good cheer

To not isolate

To sink beyond help, but I reckon this light is for me

Is it beyond reality?

Sure this is me

Hope is but a glimmer beyond the chaos

So here I am pondering upon this time

To not be lost within out of minds for the chaos will reap our hearts

Here we are being beyond the sanity, but what a grasp it is

To ponder wander and wonder

Perhaps this will save a life or two…

To Wonder

To ponder?

 what is to be within the insanity

 but a hope to bring balance a light for all a desire

 to be just be within destiny of thy heart

 do one confess what is light in the right 

but Allah that's what right in this night

Upon time do I wonder

What is Next?
But Dua for the heart
is that truly whats for me
it brings serenity
is this peace
for the mind
as we recite what is just
what is right
in this day
night
eve
morning
dawn to dusk
I call upon thee
Oh Allah
I surrender
to hope
to cope
In shall Allah

This will be Now

I stand falling to my knees
I as I prostrate to thee
Allah almighty
I must confess to you with my heart
this pain
this monster than lies deep within me
Is here with me even within the sanity that is with you
Something familiar arises in thy soul
dare i say who
He conquers me so
I seek refuge in you oh Allah
because remember dua is the best

He still lingers
Of my mind
unable to cope
So dare i say
I'm free to be me within this insanity

he snickers and suggests and demands
tears run rapid down my cheers my eyes water
no time for tears
I'm ashamed
I'm not worth it
I'm tarnished
beyond repair

Why even bother saving me

I confess though in my heart and soul
that your the only God for me
not him
not his suggestions are unjust
unlike you oh Allah
you are loving
Merciful
Forgiving
Just
Without you the world truly would be lost

I feel lost within emotions
my heart says Islam is the way but i still doubt self
how can one love self 100%
not attainable for me
not yet
never

Oh Allah
Save me from my self
purify my heart
bring the Rage to Bliss
unable to conquer the darkness
left to fight tis battle on wards
its truly my jihad my struggle the insanity
i don't think anything else but you will help
Even now I don't want to be
even in this sanity I drift
and doubt
so remember you always in dkhr
you are the only one worthy of worship
One God One Love One Life

I seek refuge in Allah From the accursed Satan
Ashadu la illah allah ashadu muhammedan rusuallah
Allahu akbar
With you
I Cannot this alone
so in remembrance to you only I will try and try again
and return to you always...

Time will tell

Millions of emotions run through me
Like the current of life source
I ran so far
For so long
Only to find you again
I could only deny for so long
Before I confessed
To you alone
Then to another
Soon time will tell
If I bask in everlasting Noor
Aquire I'll
Apply it
To mold the outcome
To positively potential
To please you Allah
Nothing else matters